Five years ago, Adelaide mother Jess’ life was healthy, stable and ‘normal’.
But a catastrophic turn of events within the family plunged the now 44-year-old’s life into complete chaos.
In an attempt to ease her emotional pain, Jess made poor choices, her marriage of more than 20 years broke down and Jess was suddenly without a home with three children, aged between six and 16 at the time.
Jess and her children spent months couch surfing, living out of a car and in emergency motel accommodation.
“It was hard on the kids,” Jess says quietly.
“I couldn’t get them to school. I couldn’t feed them properly. I felt like such a bad mother. The life I thought I was going to have was completely gone.
“Living in the car was just horrifying, always moving around and then living in a one-room emergency motel room with no cooking facilities…it’s hard to describe. You can’t function normally, don’t eat properly, always on edge.
“In those circumstances you’re also often surrounded by other people with problems, so we just didn’t go out – we stayed in the room a lot of the time.”
With no rental history, getting into a rental property was impossible but when a friend suggested she connect with UnitingSA, there was a glimmer of hope.
Jess got into a house at Taperoo, surrounded by “a great community and lovely neighbours”. This also meant she could build a rental record.
“Things were great for a long time and then my best friend died,” Jess explains.
“My health wasn’t good, I had a heart attack and the doctors said to me unless I looked after myself, I may not be around long – I couldn’t do that to my kids.
“I thought of my friend and it was like, in death she saved me. I needed to work myself out.”
Jess says her heart attack made her realise who her true friends were and with the backing of her children and UnitingSA case managers, her life is increasingly healthy and stable.
“UnitingSA has been incredible – I can’t say enough. I’ve never been judged or made to feel ashamed,” Jess says.
“I’m always encouraged – my case manager’s been a great example to me. I get support in a whole range of areas and now me and my kids are on top of the world.
“I don’t know where I’d be without my case manager and UnitingSA – they literally helped keep my family together. We recently moved into our new place they helped me with, there’s food in the fridge and it feels like home.”
Now focussed on continuing improvements to her health, Jess says “I know who and what’s important”.
“I’d tell other people – don’t lose hope. Focus on achieving small things every day – that might be just getting out of bed and having a shower, or doing the dishes, maybe making dinner.
“All the little things add up and make you feel more positive. I’d like to get a role where I can mentor other people. I’d tell them – don’t be afraid to be honest and ask for help – it will change your life. Storms always pass.”